Living Each Day

Two weeks ago I was given a surprise medical diagnosis. Colon cancer. I have no symptoms. In fact, I feel great. I don’t smoke; I eat a low fat/low salt diet with no beef; I get plenty of exercise; my weight is average; my age is relatively young at 51. It all started when a stool test showed positive for blood. That followed with my first colonoscopy. More tests and doctor visits followed. Surgery is still to come. The cancer appears to be caught early and is small enough that chemo and radiation isn’t necessary before surgery. The last couple of weeks have been a challenge to come to grips with this new reality. Fortunately my husband, E, has been so supportive. He has made the last couple weeks bearable while we deal with a lot of uncertainty.

This short nine-second video has been a reminder that we should live each day like it could be your last. There are also no guarantees even when you have the right of way.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BO2rW1alVv8

10 Gay Signs I Missed Growing Up

I’ve written before that I came out late in life. Reflecting back, however, there were signs of my gayness that I did not recognize back when I was in elementary and high school. I knew I was different but I choose to ignore it and repress it. Here is my list of 10 signs I missed:

(10) I checked-out and listened to all the Broadway Cast Albums in our local library when I was in junior high school. I made mix-tapes of my favorite Broadway songs.
(9) I didn’t start buying rock and roll records until the second half of high school (Elton John, David Bowie, etc.). Prior to that, I loved listening to the pop divas of the day on the radio (late 60’s & early 70’s): Karen Carpenter, Cher, Petula Clark, Melanie, Dionne Warwick, Cass Elliot, etc. I knew the words to all their hits.
(8) During grade school, my dad had a basement full of Playboy and Penthouse magazines. I always thought the pictures of the naked women were creepy and would flip by them quickly. However, I enjoyed reading the articles and trying to make sense and understand the sex jokes in the cartoons.
(7) I thought my best Halloween costume in grade school was the year I dressed up in drag and wore my mother’s red wig.
(6) Ever since I was very small, I wanted a doll house of my own. My parents did not buy a doll house until my sister was born. Although the house was not mine, I was allowed to furnish and accessorize it.
(5) Playing sports was never an interest of mine but I always took my time changing in the locker room for PE or swim lessons. If I had to try out for a sport, I always thought wrestling or swimming would be interesting.
(4) I was envious of my little sister getting to take dance lessons. But I never spoke up to my parents about it. It would be many years later before I took dance classes on my own.
(3) I always thought Paul Lynde and Charles Nelson Reilly were funny and outrageous along with the other queer-type closet TV comics, Don Knotts and Tony Randall. I would try to mimic their routines.
(2) I was a band geek all through junior high and high school. I thought half-time shows with marching bands were the best part of football games. Seeing a marching band in a parade still brings a lump to my throat.
(1) The highlight, for me, of the Key Club ski trip I went on in high school was sharing a double bed with the most handsome student body officer in our class. Nothing happened.

National Coming Out Day: Celebrate October 11... If not now, when? Whether you're lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer or not, be proud of who you are and your support for LGBT equality. A simple conversation can change the lives of people you care about. Coming out information and guides are available at the HRC site.
In September the New York Times Magazine did a major feature on middle-school youth coming out. Outlet, a local teen organization that we support is mentioned in the article. Outlet supports and empowers local GLBTQQ youth by providing counseling and community, leadership training & advocacy, and outreach awareness.

October is for Gay Activism

CALIFORNIA: The Marriage Recognition and Family Protection Act will affirm that California will continue to recognize the marriages of couples who married outside the state prior to the passage of Prop. 8—and that those who marry out-of-state in the future won’t be treated as complete legal strangers in California.
Opponents of marriage equality claim are once again using lies and scare tactics to deny us equality. We must not let them win. Put an end to their campaign of lies! Enough is enough. Call the Governor today to set the facts straight. Let him know of your support for the Marriage Recognition and Family Protection Act.
Call the Governor's Capitol Office (automated line): 916-445-2841

MAINE: Protect Maine Equality. Vote No on 1. This is going to be a close vote. The anti-gay groups that won in California are now in Maine spewing lies and misinformation. Donate, volunteer, make calls, and write letters. Vote early.

WASHINGTON: Washington State's Domestic Partnership Law is under attack. A yes vote on Referendum 71 will keep Washington’s Domestic Partnership Law and ensure fairness and equality for all Washington citizens. Donations and volunteers are needed

NATIONALLY: The National Equality March, October 10-11, 2009 in Washington, DC, is an event to show support for full equality on the door step of those who can make that happen: the Congress of the United States. The goal is equal protection in all matters governed by civil law in all 50 states.

NATIONALLY: GLBT History Month highlights annually the achievements of 31 gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender Icons—one each day—with a free video, bio, bibliography, downloadable images and other resources.

NATIONALLY: National Coming Out Day on October 11, 2009. Share your story, educate people.

ON GOING:
- Repeal Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell (DADT). Write, talk to or visit your congress person. Write President Obama. Spread the word by submitting a letter to the Editor to your local paper.
- Pass and sign into law the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA). It is pending in Congress. The bill will ensure workplace equality by protecting LGBT workers from employment discrimination. The bill protects workers from discriminatory hiring, firing, promotion or compensation practices, as well as retaliation for reporting such practices. Write, talk to or visit your congress person. Write President Obama.

Firmware Flashback

Earlier this year my mother was cleaning out her files and found this old newspaper clipping. I am one of spellbound high school freshmen. See the kid on the right with glasses, standing next to the math teacher? That is me. The picture dates from sometime in the early 1970s.

We are being wowed by a new technological breakthrough called a programmable electronic calculator. Oooooo, look but don’t touch!

The back of the clipping says we are looking at the school’s new Wang calculator. I poked around the web and by comparing pictures I think I have determined that the calculator is a Wang 720c Advance Programming Calculator. Just about everything you would want to know about one can be found at this Old Calculator Web Museum webpage: http://www.oldcalculatormuseum.com/wang720.html

Here is a “flashback” song and video, an old school computer remix of Queen’s “Bohemian Rhapsody”. It is performed on an Atari 800XL, Texas Instruments TI-99/4a, 8 Inch Floppy Disk, 3.5 inch Harddrive, and a HP ScanJet 3C. (Found on Wayne’s Nude Musicians blog)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ht96HJ01SE4

Hiking in the French Alps (vacation p. 2)

Capturing the essence of an almost two-week hike in the French Alps on paper is next to impossible. It is easy enough to review plays seen, to describe museums visited, and to detail (as much as we dare) the nightlife enjoyed. But, to describe the sights, sounds, and smells of a hike that sometimes feels totally exhilarating and at other times, absolutely exhausting -- that I find quite impossible.

This year's adventure hike for us was on the Grande Randonnee 5, considered one of the world's premiere hiking trails. In its entirety, the GR5 runs from the Netherlands to the Mediterranean and takes months to complete. The section we did is in the French Alps and runs from Megève, FR (near Geneva) to Menton (two coastal cities from Nice). If we had done the hike point-to-point, it would have taken 5-6 weeks; and we would have stayed in lots of mountain huts, probably carried our own packs, and hiked in parts not as exciting as what we ended up seeing. So, we opted for the 12-day version, where we hiked 7-9 hours each day on the best of the trail options along the 200-mile stretch, staying in small hotels and inns along the way, and shuttling a few minutes each day from our residences to the trail heads. As we often do, we traveled with Mountain Travel-Sobek and with guides certified by the world-renown "Compagnie des guides de Chamonix," a professional guide association that dates back to the first climb of Mont Blanc over 200 years ago.

One of the things that made this particular hike so wonderful is that each day seemed to be distinctly unique and different from all the rest (which really shows up in my pictures). In fact, I have titled each day of the hike with a different theme:
Day 1: Views of the Mont Blanc Range
Day 2: Hiking above Lakes and on Ridges
Day 3: Waterfalls and Glaciers by the Scores
Day 4: Jagged Peaks and the Sound of Streams
Day 5: Massive Outcroppings and Rocky Summits All Around
Day 6: "Scenes from the Sierra Nevada of California"
Day 7: Rocky Trails Hidden in Fog
Day 8: Reflecting Lakes (or, Scenes from 500-Piece Jigsaw Puzzles)
Day 9: Multi-colored Rocks and Boulders
Day 10: Forest and Ridge Hiking
Day 11: Descending to the Mediterranean
(One day in the middle was a rest day, to round out the 12.)

We were fortunate to see lots of bird and animal life during the two weeks. In particular, we had very close encounters with marmots (which look and act like chubby prairie dogs) and chamois (beautiful and shy mountain goats). We also one day saw the endangered and very rare bearded vulture soaring way above with its 8-foot wing span.

Some nights, the inns/hotels we stayed in were surrounded by little more than one church and a few houses (or on one night, totally by itself on a ridge). Other nights, we were in such settings as a 17th- century fortified city, a town of wooden buildings where the second floors had been traditionally used to dry out produce and grains, a town of extremely narrow streets and gutters running down the petite avenues, a resort town on a river with our hotel and its large outdoor patios perched on a hill above, and our final town right on the Mediterranean. One of the moments we will never forget is hearing a long pealing of church bells in one small French town just as Senator Edward Kennedy's funeral was beginning in the USA, a great tribute to a man respected world-wide.

Our days were in many ways very similar, even though the scenery changed each day:
- The alarm goes off and we are up at 7:10 a.m.
- Breakfast at 7:30. Usually cheese, bread and coffee or tea
- Pack lunch at 8:00; finish getting ready (sun screen, e.g.).
- Leave at 8:30 with the two other couples and guide to begin the day’s trek.
- Hike UP all morning (huffing, puffing, sweating), culminating sometime between 1 and 1:30 by crossing a 'col' (a high, mountain pass) -- although on several days we crossed two cols; and on one day, three. Most cols on this trip were in the 8000-9000' height. Our highest two were at 9566' (Col d' Aussois) and 9504'.(Col Blanchet).
- Have a well-deserved and always tasty lunch. (Philippe, one of our two guides, was in charge of lunch food for this trip and out-did himself. We had great variety and many wonderful delicacies and cheeses.)
- Begin our afternoon of descending. On some days, this was extensive and lasted for hours. When the downhill was really steep, most of us found it harder than going up.
- Have a mid-afternoon treat of French chocolate and cookies (yum-yum).
- Get to the van for a short trip to our new hotel, where bags were waiting in our room.
- Wash clothes. (Yes, every day. Socks, shirts, underwear. Rule is, pack only 3 of each for entire trip. Hiking shorts lasted more days and had to washed less.)
- Shower ... and I use the term loosely. In the Alps, and in Europe in general, you will always have a bidet in your room -- Lord knows why -- but you may have just a tub; a tub with spray nozzle but no curtain; a shower that is big enough for a short, 90-pound person; a shower where the water comes in a few drops every minute or two. You get the picture. But in any case, each one felt great at this point in the day.
- Rest maybe 15-30 minutes. Or, maybe 'walk the town' for a few minutes, if there was a town.
- Go at 7 p.m. have a beer or two or some wine before dinner with our fellow travelers at the bar.
- Eat dinner with the group at 7:30.
- Be offered cheese course between 8:30 and 9:00 -- This being after a full meal, some wine, and satisfaction settling in. However, we discovered the French really take their cheese seriously and could not quite understand why Americans did not want to have smelly cheese with bread after an already, often very rich (sauces, butter, cheese, etc.) meal. (As you may see, French is my least favorite cuisine, although many nights we did have wonderful meals, to be sure.)
- Head back to our room by 9:15. Get everything prepared for the next morning.
- 9:30 or so, turn lights out and fall to sleep immediately.

Why, you may ask? (All of our friends and family don't understand at all how two theater queens want to spend time each year on such an adventure -- or 'torture trail,' as they tend to describe it.)

Why? Because we can eat and drink all we want the rest of the vacation and still come home without any poundage gain!

Theatreworks goes to Broadway

On September 23, the musical “Memphis” will become TheatreWorks' first show to reach the Broadway stage. Originally developed in their New Works Festival, the world premiere musical highlighted 2003/04 mainstage season and became one of the theatre’s greatest hits. That production featured an astonishing cast, and many of our original leads are starring in the New York production.

The TheatreWorks community has a unique opportunity to be enchanted once again by this inspiring musical hit. If you are visiting New York City, take advantage of this valuable discount ticket offer. Call 212-947-8844 or visit broadwayoffers.com and use code METHW0819. You'll enjoy a great Broadway show, and TheatreWorks will receive a $5 donation for every ticket purchased!

Artists who have participated in previous New Works Initiative workshops at TheatreWorks include Mark Allen , Todd Almond, Sean Barry, Neil Bartram, Raquel Bitton, Beth Blatt, Nell Benjamin, David Bryan, Kirsten Childs, Darrah Cloud, Joe DiPietro, David Ford, Jenny Giering, Daniel Goldfarb, Paul Gordon, Jack Heifner, Brian Hill, Aaron Jafferis, Tom Jones, Rajiv Joseph, Lynne Kaufman, Kait Kerrigan, David Kirshenbaum, Gihieh Lee, Andrew Lippa, Brian Lowdermilk, Taj Mahal, Brendan Milburn, Tommy Newman, Marsha Norman, Laurence O’Keefe, Billy Philadelphia, Steven Sater, Laura Schellhardt, Scott Schwartz, Stephen Schwartz, Tanya Shaffer, Duncan Sheik, Kim D. Sherman, Chris Smith, Lee Summers, Matthew Sweet, Vienna Teng, Joe Thalken, Valerie Vigoda, and Chay Yew.

While TheatreWorks audiences see the fruits of the New Works Initiative on our main stage every year, works originating here regularly go on to success at other regional theatres and in New York.
The “Summer of ’42”, a musical developed at TheatreWorks with music and lyrics by David Kirshenbaum and book by Hunter Foster, had an off-Broadway run in 2002.
“Vanities: A New Musical”, with music and lyrics also by David Kirshenbaum and book by Jack Heifner begin an off-Broadway run this last summer at Second Stage Theatre and has also been produced at Pasadena Playhouse.
GrooveLily’s illuminating holiday hit ‘Striking 12” also enjoyed a successful off-Broadway run.
Paul Gordon’s sparkling adaptation of Jane Austen’s “Emma”, which became the highest-grossing, most-attended production in TheatreWorks history, has gone on to Cincinnati Playhouse in the Park, and Repertory Theatre of St. Louis.
Bill Cain's play “Equivocation” is currently premiering at the Oregon Shakespeare Festival and will come to Marin Theatre Company this season and open in NYC at the Manhattan Theatre Club in February 2010.
The Matthew Sweet musical “Girlfriend” is in the upcoming Berkeley Rep season.

Speaking of Berkeley Repertory Theatre, they have done an amazing job as well. They have sent 12 shows to New York in the last 12 years, including four to Broadway in the last four years:

“Bridge & Tunnel” [After workshopped at Berkeley, Sarah Jones’ one woman show played five months on Broadway and won her a Tony Award.]
“Passing Strange” [Berkeley Rep was one of the producers of this Broadway run, which earned a Tony Award for Best Book. The show also won three Drama Desk Awards, two Obie Awards, and many other honors before being made into a film by Spike Lee.]
“Wishful Drinking” [Hollywood legend Carrie Fisher worked on her solo show at Berkeley. It is playing a limited engagement at Roundabout Theatre’s Studio 54.]
“In the Next Room (or the vibrator play)” [Debuts at the Lincoln Center Theater this fall.]
Currently Berkeley Rep is presenting a new musical that has Broadway ambitions: “American Idiot” It unites the songs of the band Green Day with the director of “Spring Awakening”, Michael Mayer.

Amsterdam vacaton - August 2009

As we planned our Summer ‘09 trip to Amsterdam, almost everyone we told that we intended to stay nine days looked at us in amazement and said, "Why?" People told us that 2-4 days was plenty because it is relatively small and compact, it has only a few interesting museums, it is too seedy, it is mostly canals and bridges, it is expensive, etc. Unwavering, we stayed with our plan and our predisposition that we like really getting to know one city at a time and having adequate time in the most interesting cities to walk the streets, explore the nooks and crannies, hit all the key sights and the lesser-visited ones, etc. We had done this in Vienna, Prague, Berlin, Cuzco, London, Reykjavik, Edinburgh, etc. But we also hedged our bets and always replied that we also knew there were also many one-day trips we could take from Amsterdam to other parts of the country and even to Belgium.

Well, after our nine days, we were ready to stay another week; and we already are thinking about when we can go back. I am not sure any city we have visited has quite captured us in the way Amsterdam did. One of the key differences is that we came away meeting many very interesting local and visiting people while there. The city's outdoor cafes and bars and its openness to all cultures and types as well as its predominance of English usage among natives and visitors made it very easy to strike up conversations wherever we went.

So, what were some of our highlights?
First, any one who has been to Amsterdam can attest to its unique beauty. Canals and bridges link the scores of islands that make up the City. Canal houses, largely built in the 17th-19th centuries, command the casual stroller to look up at the unique facades and tops of the buildings and to notice how many of them lean forward, sideways and every other direction possible. Hundreds of houseboats of every description line the canals, and thousands of black bikes are parked and locked in every available space, in every imaginable manner. Church spires mark neighborhoods as do red lights mark districts for prostitution. Coffee shops by the dozens sell legal marijuana and hashish; while cafes by the hundreds line streets for strong coffee and discussion. Cobblestones make walking a bit difficult but very romantic. Ice cream and French fry shops dot the city. History is every where. Fun is totally in the air.

The MUSEUMS: In a word, WOW!
- The Van Gogh Museum: While as crowded as any museum we have ever visited, we never felt rushed or unable to see each painting for the amount of time we wanted. The excellent audio tour talks about each displayed painting, not just the random one here and there. The sequence is well planned along the walls and follows the chronology of Van Gogh's life and changing abodes. The crowds move at a snail's pace, but they move together as they listen and look. We were so impressed with the presentation, the art, and the subsequent learning.

- The Anne Frank House: To ready ourselves, we re-watched two movies about Anne Frank before leaving the USA. We were prepared (we thought), but the impact was even greater than we expected. Again, the officials have figured out how to deal with huge crowds that line up daily from 9 a.m. to 10 p.m. We were moved through the house in a small group at a good pace. Walking into the hiding space through the bookcase door we had seen in the movies, seeing Anne's movie-star pictures still on the wall, hearing her church bells and seeing her chestnut tree through the attic window, and even stepping lightly on the creaking floor boards out of respect for how quiet they had to be those two years of hiding -- The impact of it all was over-whelming.

- The Rijksmuseum: Housing probably the world's best collection of 17th century Dutch Master artists, this museum was amazing. It also was very well-laid out and had a fantastic audio tour. We were both particularly blown away by the Rembrandt paintings. Unlike many we have seen in other museums that always appear dark, these showed much light and color. They had all been restored in the past few years to remove the protective shellac that had sealed them for so many years, bringing them back to their original states. We also were struck by the other artists of the time and their beautiful portraits of local civic leaders and life. (Only 25% of the museum was actually open, due to extensive and multi-year renovations; but even that amount took us several hours and was remarkable. We look forward to returning some day when the entire museum is open.)

- The Amsterdam Historisch Museum: Charting the history of the City and country and especially of its meteoric rise during the Golden Age of the 1600s (when Netherlands ruled the seas and the trading world), the museum was fascinating and very educational. The audio tour was exceptional, and we were particularly interested in the section devoted to the Nazi occupation period. We also saw an authentic re-creation of the first gay bar in Amsterdam. We went to this museum early in our visit in order to set the context for the rest of our stay and explorations.

- The Hermitage Amsterdam: This extension of the world-renown Hermitage from St. Petersburg just opened in what was the 'widest' building in Amsterdam when it was built (as a retirement home). The first exhibit that is housed in the several huge buildings and their two floors is on the 19th century czars, their families, lives, courts, wealth, and achievements. The ball gowns and uniforms alone that were displayed as if at court before the czar were absolutely stunning. The huge paintings of the rulers and their families were testament to what handsome and beautiful people they all were. While some were real despots and while they together certainly brought destruction on themselves and their ways of life, we were struck how family oriented they seemed to be in each generation. We were overall amazed how all the things we saw has survived the 1917 revolution and all the years of Communism.

- Museum Willet- Holthuysen: This is one of several grand canal houses built in the late 1600s, early 1700s that are today open in full display of the grandeur and life of the wealthy at that time and into the 18th centuries. This particular house had a great collection of the owners' ceramics and dishes as well as art.

- Museum Het Rembrandthuis: While standing in Rembrandt's studio, his storage room of collectibles that often appeared in his paintings, and in his bedroom has some exciting aspects, we were overall not that impressed by this experience; but we went since it is on every one's 'must-do' list.

- The Verzetsmuseum: Following the development of the Dutch resistance movement, year-by-year, from the invasion of May 1940 to the liberation in May 1945, this very hands-on, 'in your face' museum was probably our biggest surprise and the most fascinating of all we visited. Hiding nothing, the museum set the stage even before the invasion of the life in Amsterdam, for its Jews and its other inhabitants. Like in other parts of Europe and even in the US, Hitler had him sympathizers in the early days of his reign in Amsterdam. As Amsterdam was finally invaded, life actually did not change that much at first since Hitler saw it as the ideal Aryan site overall. The changes that did occur in the first year or so were mostly for the Jews. The City did react quickly and in a big way through its unions for a general one-day strike after the first set of Jews were deported, but a swift, deadly reaction by the Nazis shut up immediately visible resistance; and most people just watched as the 80000 Jews were rounded up, family by family. The museum chronicles what it took to get a resistance movement really moving and why it took so long. As a visitor, we were given small, hand-held computers that guided us through the museum in a logical order and that added music, sounds, movie clips, and other information beyond what we saw in the exhibits. We were also asked along the way to respond to "What would YOU have done," and then saw our answers compared to past visitors. The entire experience was challenging, educational, and totally thought-provoking.

There were many other museums we did not get to (by choice and by necessity of time); and maybe we'll regret not going to the Erotic, the Hemp, the Torture, the Madame Tussaud's Wax, or the Sex Museums. But overall, we had a full schedule and did about as much museuming as we (and our backs) could tolerate.

We did see one more outstanding museum as part of a day's bike trip we took to the nearby totally charming town of Haarlem. The Frans Hals Museum is considered by many to be one of the best in the country, featuring this Grand Master of the 16th Century as well as his collected paintings and house furnishings of the time. The large museum is unique in that many of the paintings are displayed as they would have been in regular rooms of a house, along with other furnishings of the time.

The JEWISH HISTORY OF AMSTERDAM:
Whenever we visit a European city, we spend as much time as is needed to visit all the Jewish sites that still exist. In Amsterdam, as in many Nazi-occupied cities, the sites are now few; and the history, very sad.

The Jewish Museum (Joods Historisch Museum) is within the buildings of the "Old" and "New" Synagogues of Amsterdam; and on the site where two more synagogues also existed at one time. The restored interior of the Old Synagogue is beautiful, and it is the oldest public synagogue in Europe. The museum, using high technology as well as saved remnants of Jewish life, recounts the proud and important history of a country who welcomed exiled Jews from the Spanish Inquisition and even fleeing Jews from Germany in the early and mid 1930s and where, up until the Nazi invasion, Jews had largely lived safely and in an overall flourishing manner. Of the 80000 Jews in the country prior to WWII, only a fraction survived.

The Portugues-Israelitische Synagogue, built in 1675, was the largest synagogue in Europe when it was built. The bulky, red-brick building and surrounding building miraculously survived the Nazis. The massive, wooden-vaulted ceiling, the huge windows bringing in full light, the huge brass chandeliers, the dark-wood and huge ark area, etc. all make this an impressive and yet very sad (since now mostly empty) sacred place to visit.

The Hollandsche Schouwburg was home to the Jewish operetta and Yiddish theater that thrived in Amsterdam, even after the war started. The Jewish Philharmonic was well-regarded, and even non-Jews sought to play in it. At this site, whose main facade still exists, Jews were rounded up before deportation. Today, a memorial wall with 8000 of the family names of those deported, an eternal flame, and an outdoor monument serve as reminders of the horrible events.
Throughout the City, we walked to sites where statues and plagues were devoted to the Holocaust and its victims. While not as proactive and pervasive as cities like Berlin in owning and telling its awful past, the story is told in Amsterdam in its museums and its streets; and certainly there is much more recognition of 'never again' and 'how we failed' than in a city such as Vienna, e.g.

OTHER FUN:
Amsterdam is a city of bikes like probably no other European city. 800,000 residents; and we heard estimates of at least 600,000 bikes -- all of which seem to be moving all the time. Bikes rule the narrow streets and bridges. Pedestrians, beware. Woe also to the person who believes it is possible to drive through the City. (It is admissible by law to stop your car on a one-way, narrow street up to 20 minutes to take 'care of business’ -- whatever that means.)

We took advantage of the biking tradition and did a wonderful bike tour of the City and one of the countryside with Mike's Bikes (with whom we had already done tours in Berlin and Munich). We also rented bikes on our own from them and followed the bike lanes out of the City to Haarlem, as I mentioned above, which is about a 60-75 minute ride out of the City. Every town and city in the country is connected by bike trails, by excellent signage, and even by special bike-only traffic lights.

We, like everyone, had to go to the Heineken brewery for a tour and the 'free' 3 beers your admissions gets you. Given we also were given 2 more each by some folks we met who did not want their drink tokens; we had a VERY good time.

The GAY LIFE:
As probably the Gay capital of Europe and maybe of the world, Amsterdam is gay everywhere, not just in one or two districts. GLBT folks are every where; and they are totally integrated and accepted in all Dutch life, from what we could see. Estimates are that 300K of the 800K residents are in fact GLB or T. Amsterdam is very accepting of all races, cultures, and people; it is the nearest place we have been to our own San Francisco Bay Area. We heard all the many languages and saw all the many colors of skin we see in downtown Palo Alto or SF on a typical day.

Amsterdam was one of the first cities, if not the first, to memorialize in a very moving and public way the persecution of gays by the Nazis. The three-part Homomonument juts out in one piece into one of the main canals, sits in the shadow and grounds of a major church and is next door to the Anne Frank House.

We found one gay-frequented (but not exclusively gay by any means) street (Regulierdwarsstraat) where we tended to spend every night from 5-7 or so in an outdoor bar having a cold Amstel and then moving on to one of the several outdoor restaurants (particularly the several Italian and Caribbean ones) on the street. We particularly loved lounging on the outdoor couches of SOHO where we met some fascinating men from around the globe. We also like a bar called April, a very trendy and high-style gay bar. We danced at the 3-floor Exit night club nearby and made our way up and down the street each night. We certainly explored many other of the 100+ gay bars and venues in the City (including a fun club called "Church") within gay Amsterdam, but we kept coming back to this area as the one where we felt at home.

Our hotel was also a real winner. As we tend to do all over the US and the world, we stayed at a gay-owned, boutique-style hotel. The Amistad was warm, friendly and very comfortable (and overall affordable). We met very interesting, new friends from Australia and Germany; and our hosts (Danny, Mike and Elioje) were the best.

Finally, a real highlight of our time in Amsterdam was a private, 2-hour canal trip offered arranged by our hotel. Our hosts (Gary and Steve) are from the US and have recently moved to Amsterdam to set up a laundry business. They provided wine and snacks for our late afternoon journey through the beautiful water streets and alleys of the city. Their stories were wonderful; and their knowledge of their relatively new home, impressive. The Saturday evening we went happened to be a record-breaking warm day, so the canals were packed with boats and parties.

All in all, what a City! Lots of people come to our home area and leave their hearts here. Well, we did the same in Amsterdam.

A Few Notes on Our Time in Geneva and Nice
While we did not stay as long in either city as we did in Amsterdam, we did enjoy the time we were there. In Geneva only for 24 hours, we mostly visited with a former aupair of Eddie's family (Peterson) who lives near Bern in Switzerland. We did together take a boat tour of Lake Geneva and had a lovely, long dinner on the lake that evening.

Our three days in Nice at the end of our trip (after our two weeks of hiking in the French Alps) did entail much more serious touring. We walked the hilly city by the hour, exploring in particular its beautiful seashore of a dozen-plus major beaches as well as its Old Town of incredibly narrow and beautiful streets from centuries past. We went to the Matisse and National Biblical Message Marc Chagall museums (both, outstanding) as well as the Archaeology Museum in the Cimiez neighborhood of Nice with its Roman ruins site and to the Museum of Modern and Contemporary Art (in which the building itself -- much like the DeYoung in San Francisco -- is interesting as the excellent exhibits. We also found time for a day at the beach on our last day in Europe as we contemplated a month of much fun and joy.

Another new year

Wow.
We barely got back from vacation and we are already starting the Jewish holidays. "L'shanah Tova" or “Happy New Year”, 5770.

Write ups of our vacation travels coming next!

On holiday, August 2009

We are off on an adventure. We will be visiting the European cities of Amsterdam, Geneva and Nice.
The main part of the trip is a two week, guided hike on the GR5 (Grand Randonnée 5). We begin in the alpine region of the Mont Blanc range. We wind through valleys, cross meadows, and explore the national parks of the French Alps. Our efforts are rewarded with a finish on the shores of the French Riviera.
This will be strenuous hiking over varied terrain (max. elev. 9,566'). We will be hiking with a small group and a guide. Other than a day pack (lunch, clothes for weather changes, etc.) our luggage is shuttled to our evening destination. We spend the evenings in small inns/hotels in alpine villages where we have dinner and breakfast the next morning. We trek six to nine hours a day.
This year we are using the adventure travel company Mountain Travel Sobek. We have used them many, many times and they do an outstanding job. This trip is called “France: Hiking the GR5 - The Alps to the Sea.”
Other excellent travel companies we have used in the past are REI Adventures, Bicycle Adventures, Backroads, and the gay adventure travel company, Alyson Adventures.
We will be back posting in September.

Coming Out Jewish: Exploring Faith and Sexuality

I recently spent several hours walking in the woods. Much of the time was a quiet, reflective period. The chatter in my head slowly settled down to thoughts about how my coming out was a dual revelation. The obvious one was the recognizing and accepting of my sexuality, that I was gay. The other was developing and embracing a mature spiritual/religious understanding. For me one was not independent of the other.

I’ve written about my coming out gay previously. This is a review of my spiritual coming out.
In my twenties I had very little interest in religion. I felt I had outgrown the need for fairytales and superstitions. However, I thought church could be an interesting way to develop a new social network. After college it seemed harder to meet new and interesting people. My first wife and I were feeling isolated and cut-off. We joined a local Protestant church. I participated a little but refrained from getting too involved. My wife did not grow up going to church every Sunday like I had. She grabbed hold of the opportunity, got involved and made new friends. It served her well, especially when her health deteriorated and she died of a disease at age thirty.

My thirties became my time for spiritual exploring. I navigated a number of interesting paths but none of the resulted in a sustaining faith or conviction. On the home front, I remarried immediately. It would not be an ideal match. We were very good roommates but hardly ideal husband and wife. The second wife wanted nothing to do with any kind of religion. She developed her own separate network of friends and activities. I started exploring churches and other spiritual avenues on my own. Unfortunately, I’ve never liked going to church services by myself. I was very self-conscience about being there alone. I’m usually too shy to talk or engage with people. And when I did talk to other church members, I always hated the awkward introduction where I answer, “I’m married but my wife doesn’t attend”. The usual patronizing reply was “we’ll pray for her.” Ugh! I hated that. Bottom line, I never felt like I fit in or belonged there.

I joined a men’s study group at another church. We would meet weekly before work and discuss a Christian book. Topics often were on men’s issues and faith. I loved going to that group until the minister moved away and the group disbanded. There wasn’t another good leader to continue it. One of the things I liked about this minister was he had a larger view of religious topics and ideas than most of the men participating in the group. He was not as closed-minded and literal believing as many of the congregation were.

I dropped away from that church and began a new quest. I got involved in a secular men’s group. I started reading books by Joseph Campbell, Robert Bly, Sam Keen, etc. I did a men’s self-improvement weekend and joined a men’s group. Found lots of ritual but very little depth of meaning. After a couple of years, I dropped my connections with the group.

By my late thirties I started exploring and experimenting with my same-sex attraction with other married men. I spoke to one of my buddies about my interest in religion and desire to participate somehow but not being able to find a satisfying way to do it. He said he was thinking about taking a bible study class as well. Together we took classes for a year and half. I ended up reading most of the Bible. Again, I loved the study but did not participate in the church services. This Bible study class went a long way to fill a spiritual and social need. We would car pool together and go out of coffee every week after class. Much of the time we discussed the topics and readings from the class. I was sad and disappointed when the class series ended. Because of all the group study and reading I have done, I consider myself to be very knowledgeable layperson about the scriptures. During this time I also read books by religious (mostly Christian) scholars such as Karen Armstrong, Jack Miles, Marcus J. Borg and N.T. Wright.

You could say that forties was my midlife crisis. I came out, divorced and began a new relationship with E. I also converted to Reform Judaism after a year and half of study with a rabbi. It was important to both of us to practice the same faith. Reform Judaism is very welcoming. As a denomination, they have been inclusive and supportive of gays and gay rights since the mid-1990s. With E, my spiritual longings and desire of authentic, meaningful rituals are fulfilled as we explore, worship and learn about Judaism. I love sitting with him during services. As a couple, we have enriched our Jewish experience during our travels and recreation time. In cities around the world, we have gone on walking tours of old Jewish neighborhoods and visited synagogues. We browse Jewish museums and exhibitions by Jewish artists, attended Jewish theatre and watched Jewish and Israeli films. For the first time in my life I feel like I have a fully committed spiritual life with a partner and a community.

I sometimes wonder if I would have converted to Judaism if I hadn’t met E. I think it would be unlikely unless I met someone else who was not only Jewish but actively involved with a synagogue. Coming out as a gay man, even today, would pretty much kill any involvement with almost all Christian churches. I would not want to be a part of such an organization where I had to hide who I was or even worse, told that it is a sin to be gay or Hell was your future. I am saddened and dismayed at how bigoted, intolerant and hypocritical most Christian denominations and their members are towards gay and lesbian people. I probably would have given up finding and joining a church. However, I sincerely believe if E and I were no longer together, I would still be actively involved in Reform Judaism. The road to studying and converting to Judaism renewed my faith in myself, faith in my life with the man I love, and faith that things do have positive meaning in this world.

Bay Area Musicals – World Premieres

In the past three days, we have attended two world-premiere musicals; and the two could not be more different in some ways and yet also share so much in common.

World premieres are for us some of the most exciting times in the theater. To see the birth a work, to be among the first to determine what is funny and what is not or what moves to tears and what maybe to yawns, and literally thus to be a part of the creative team as an audience member -- that is theater-going at its best.

In the past, we have seen the phenomenal "Wicked" in its first week, the successful "Legally Blonde" the first night it was seen by an audience any where, the not-so-successful "Lennon" in its birth, and the altogether failed "The Mambo Kings" whose much-anticipated life has proved to be short. All of these premieres (and more) have been produced by our often brilliant Carole Shorenstein (and of course other co-producers) who in the past 20 years has made San Francisco a major launching pad for Broadway.

More locally for us, we have seen many world premiere musicals and plays at Theatreworks, the leading professional theater in Silicon Valley and one of the largest suburban theaters in the US. TheatreWorks began 40 years ago this month with the first of its now 50 world premiere musicals and play (a rock, anti-war musical called "Popcorn"). Today, playwrights and composers literally flock to Palo Alto area to write, workshop and premiere their works (e.g., Andrew Lippa, Steven Schwartz, Tom Jones, Henry Krieger, etc.). Currently, the New Works Festival '09 features six new musicals and plays being given staged readings (i.e., professional productions with scripts still in hand and with minimal staging, no costumes or scenery). At this stage, audience members are encouraged to give written feedback to the writers about what parts works well and what are problematic.

And that brings us back to this week's two premieres we saw. One, "Tinyard Hill" by the exciting and up and coming team of Mark Allen and Tommy Newman, is a "country musical" that takes place in 1964 in rural Georgia. The production is first-class in every respect (well-respected New York actors, outstanding sets and costumes, top-notch direction, lighting, sound, etc.). The story is very compelling as the nascent Vietnam conflict is fast becoming a war and is a growing topic of interest and concern of the small community of Tinyard Hill.

The beauty of this production is in the relationships of its four characters, including one of the best portrayals of a father-son relationship I have ever seen. The music is apropos for the era and the setting, with a rock country beat with often haunting and foreboding quality to it. But, as a premiere, all is not perfect or settled yet. The first act at times seems a bit choppy (lots of scenes, some songs so abruptly ending that the audience was not sure whether to clap or not, e.g.). On the other hand, the second half seems close to 'being done," The story quickens, the songs really move the story along, and the outcome moves to one that really grabs every one's heart and brings today's Iraqi and Afghan wars right onto the 1964 stage.

Whether "Tinyard Hill" has a life beyond this production is still unknown, but I would not be surprised for it at least to show up on many a local repertory stages in the next few years. (By the way, one of TheatreWorks' recent world premieres -- "Vanities, the Musical" -- is now at Second Stage, an off-Broadway and highly respected venue. Another, "Memphis," opens in October at a Shubert theater on Broadway.)

Last night, we were privileged to be in the second audience ever to see “Rent Boy Ave.: A 'Fairy's' Tale”. The music is by Michael Mohammed and the book and lyrics by Nick A. Olivero, artistic director of the small, urban Boxcar Theatre where we saw the musical. With similarities to "Rent," "Passing Strange," and various Mamet plays, the raw realities of the street life right outside the theater's San Francisco doors explode all around the audience. Sitting all around the graffiti-covered walls and columns sometimes in clumps of 2-5 people, sometimes on scaffolding or in a corner almost alone, the audience interacts from the moment they arrive with roaming street people. A wandering, muttering woman (Trashcan Sally) turns and confronts entering audience demanding money or cursing them just for being there -- not unlike what folks may have encountered only minutes before on the sidewalks coming to the small theater.

The 50 audience members are soon brought into the daily drama and boredom of the street's life, meeting various characters with and without names. Pimp, social worker nun, married hetero looking for young boy for hire, male and female prostitutes, drug addicts, mental cases -- they are all here' and all have formed an uneasy alliance and community that we learn is almost impossible for them to leave, even when given the chance.

The music is loud rock; and sometimes in this early stage of the musical's development, a bit unintelligible. But, the overall effect of a cast of non-professional, young actors who are probably getting at best gas/bus money for the several-week run -- the effect is exhilarating. Like "Tinyard Hill," the new work still needs work. Come back several years; and if it lives to see further productions (many new works never go beyond their world premiere), we will probably not recognize it as it is further refined and shaped.

Even more than "Tinyard Hill," frankly, I would love to see "Rent Boy Ave." get a full New York production in a year or two. I really think there is seed of brilliance here that audiences need to see to better understand the life we all try to ignore as we walk the streets of New York, San Francisco, Palo Alto, etc.

My advice: Go to the theater to see world premieres whenever you can. Do not expect perfection or a finished product. But do expect to feel electricity, excitement, and deep emotion as you witness the creative process before you.

TIP: Half-price tickets for many select performances, sporting events and family activities are often available on Goldstar Events. Areas include San Francisco Bay Area, San Jose, San Diego, Orange County, Los Angeles, New York, Las Vegas, Washington DC, Boston, and Chicago.
Goldstar Events is our favorite source of cheap tickets in the SF Bay Area. But it is not the only option. You can also find half-price tickets at: Artsopolis – good for San Jose & the South Bay. And Theatre Bay Area - discount tickets from member theatres available online and/or at TIX Union Square, SF.

Campus Wildlife

One of the biggest joys of working on campus is running “The Dish” at lunch. The Dish is a recreation and conservation area in the foothills above the university. It is also the home of an old radiotelescope (hence the “dish” name). On a clear day there are breathtaking views from San Francisco to the north, across the bay to Berkeley and Oakland and south to San Jose. E and I run the trails three to four times a week. It is a good workout of 4-5 miles on rolling hills.

Over the years I have seen quite a bit of wildlife. Here is a list of what I remember seeing while running the trails around The Dish and the campus:

Birds include: Snowy Egret, Great Blue Heron, Canada Goose, Mallard,
owls, hawks, falcons, Golden Eagle, Turkey Vulture,
Ring-necked Pheasant, California Quail, California Gull, Mourning Doves,
swifts, hummingbirds, woodpeckers, flycatchers, jays, crows, starlings, Red-winged Blackbirds, ravens, swallows, wrens, chickadees, American Robin, Northern Mockingbird, American Goldfinch, California Towhee, warblers, sparrows and finches.
(Can you tell I use to be a bird watcher as a kid?)

- Black-tailed Deer
- Black-tailed Jackrabbits and Cottontail Rabbits
- Coyote
- Red Fox
- Raccoons
- Striped Skunk
- California Ground Squirrels (On a one mile section of the trail, I counted 163 squirrels.)
- Voles and gophers
- Mice
- Gopher snake and garter snake (I have not seen a rattlesnake in the area.)
- Western Fence Lizards
- Frogs
- Tarantula spider (I have seen a 4-inch tarantula crawling along the path several years in a row.)
- Painted Lady Butterfly migration in late March/early April
- Annual infestation of caterpillars (soon to be Tussock Moths)

There are two protected species in the Dish area. I have not seen either of them: the California Tiger Salamander and a mountain lion.

2009 NYC Theatre marathon

E, my husband, has written up our eight day trip of theatre in New York City…

To summarize, we saw 14 shows (13 B'Way and 1 Off B'Way) while in NYC for 8 days and 9 nights. We only paid full price for 3 shows; the others we got at 50-60% off the cost through Theatermania.com, Playbill.com, Broadwaybox.com, or NYTix.com.

We feel 2009 is a really strong year for New York theater; there were actually other shows we wanted to see but did not have enough slots to schedule (e.g., "The Norman Conquests"). The July 4th week audiences were mostly sold out in every venue we attended. The buzz was great, and standing ovations were common.

The Musicals
So, the Tony's got it right, in our opinion, in terms of Best New Musical. "Billy Elliot" is an amazing show, with the strong melodies, story, setting, and emotions of a "Ragtime" or a "Les Miz." I didn't cry once but several times during the show (and I knew the story well already). The many kids in the show were fantastic, and my only regret is that we could not see it more times in order to see all of the current 4 boys playing "Billy Elliot." I would say it is worth a special effort to be in New York (or London) while this show is playing and to do everything you can to get a hard-to-come-by ticket (which you will need to get way in advance and will have to pay full price).

But, any of the nominated musicals would have been great choices this year to win "Best New Musical." If voting, Ed and I would have given at least a 'tie' vote to "Shrek" for "best musical." (Yes, I said SHREK!!) The production is nothing short of amazing. The music is fun and up-lifting. The sets are incredible and clever without being over-the-top. The use of puppetry throughout is clearly in the old English tradition of Punch and Judy. But more than anything, the leads are fantastic. Brian D'Arcy James as Shrek and Daniel Breaker as Donkey are a wonderful pair together and give award-winning performances, even with all the make-up they must wear. This is a show adults should not hesitate to go to, even though the matinee performance we attended was half kids. Like the movie, the humor reaches all levels and is actually pretty risqué at times. It is a great story with an important message (much like "Wicked"). We totally recommend seeing "Shrek."

Like many of our friends have told us, "Next to Normal" also clearly could have been named Best New Musical. What a powerful show. And without a doubt, Alice Ripley gives the Best Actress in a Musical performance that she deservedly won. Every person in the 5 person cast is a winner, actually. The story is sometimes hard to watch and is very heart-gripping. The mother in this seemingly 'normal' family has suffered for over a decade with bipolar disease, and the entire family rides the roller coaster with her in the course of the musical. The story is also about loss, regrets, and yet hope with the resolution to "move on." As the daughter says, "If we can't have normal, then just give me next-to-normal. That would be nice, too." I am sure this will be done here in the Bay Area in the next year or two. (TheatreWorks could do a great job, I know.) Don't miss it.

A real surprise (along with "Shrek") for us was "Rock of Ages." Probably no show we saw had the audience rocking in the aisles and on their feet at their seats any more than this one. Piecing together the music of many bands of the 80s (Journey, Night Ranger, Styx, REO Speedwagon, Pat Benatar, Twisted Sister, Poison, Asia, Whitesnake and more ... music I frankly have never been fond of since I think the 80s was the lost decade when it comes to rock), the musical creates a fun, often tongue-in-cheek story much like our very favorite "Xanadu" did two years prior. (in fact, it uses the same story line and some of the same elements as "Xanadu" and "Mama Mia!") The music really works in this context and is delivered by a stellar and talented cast. We loved every minute of this show and are so glad that we went, even with initial reservations about yet another musical of past rock stars' music.

The show that was over-looked, in our opinion, in the Tony "Best" category but was one of the most fun and delightful shows we saw (and probably the one we laughed most and the hardest at) is "9 to 5." While the story 20-years-post-movie is perhaps a bit dated, the overall effect of the three wonderful actresses playing the Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin and Dolly Parton roles is worth the price of the ticket alone. Each is terrific. Who knew that "West Wing's" Allison Janney (the press secretary in that TV hit) could belt out musical numbers and dance (and get nominated for a Best Actress award in the meantime)? And I would go again just to see Megan Hilty play the Dolly part; she is perfect in the role and looks just like her predecessor.

Ed and I disagree on one musical we saw, although we both still enjoyed it. For me, "Hair" is too dated and continues to be a bit weak overall with such a slim story line. Seeing it in the early 70s was pretty neat for me (especially seeing my first nude scene on stage ... or was that when I saw "Oh, Calcutta"?), and the songs are definitely, in many cases, classics. And even though the cast is outstanding in this Tony-winning production and the overall look is great, it all felt 20-years out-of-context and thus a bit silly to me. Ed, on the other hand, ranked this as one of the best musicals he saw and was less concerned that it was dated. We argued awhile over beers before just agreeing to disagree.

And then there was our one disappointment for the week, and it was a HUGE disappointment. "West Side Story" did not deliver for us on hardly any level other than outstanding choreography (for which is was not even nominated for a Tony). I was shocked how the leads overall did not bring the needed voices for these parts we all love so much. The leads for Tony and Maria are beautiful in looks but had almost no spark between them. I hardly cared of their demise by the play's end, frankly. And neither they nor many of the other folks could bring what is required for this challenging, beautiful music. Probably the telling moment that this production will not stand the test of time (in my opinion) was the very un-funny "Officer Krupke" number. I have never seen a production of WSS where the audience did not demand a reprise of this slap-stick number. Our sold-out audience's applause maybe lasted 15-20 seconds after a number that will usually bring an audience to its feet mid-play. The strongest role in the production is Karen Olivo as Anita (who won the Tony), but her pivotal (to the story) number "A Boy Like That" is done entirely in Spanish. For anyone who does not know the story well and who cannot speak fluent Spanish, much was missed by Laurents' choice to use so much Spanish, especially for this song. (By the way, our low opinion of this production seemed to be borne out everywhere we went last week. The most common comment we heard in passing others on the street or waiting in the inevitable bathroom lines during intermissions was how people were disappointed -- and even angry -- that such a great classic in American musical theatre was handled so poorly ... for $130 per ticket.)

The Plays
This is an exceptionally strong year for plays on Broadway, it seems to me, and the audiences seem to realize and appreciate that. Houses were packed at the ones we saw (which is often not the case for plays); and curtain responses were loud, standing, and prolonged.

This is a year of stellar individual performances, too, in plays. The play and set of performances that will forever stay with me is "Waiting for Godot," a play not given much attention by the awards this year, but one that is a stunner in every respect for Ed and me. Oh my -- the four leads alone are worth a trip across country: the incomparable, Emmett-Kelly-like Bill Irwin (maybe currently my favorite actor), the always funny and gripping Nathan Lane (whom we have now seen several times), the powerful and commanding John Goodman (probably the commanding performance from this play I will never forget), and the disciplined and haunting John Glover (who somehow drools a virtual river for minutes at a time). As an ensemble, I cannot imagine how they could be better. And as a twosome, Bill and Nathan so reminded us of Laurel and Hardy, Abbot and Costello, and other great clownish twosomes of the past. Unfortunately, this play is about to close. We feel so blessed to have seen it before that happens. We only saw one other of the Best Revival nominees ("Mary Stuart"), but our belated vote for "BEST" definitely goes to this over-looked production.

And while all the other Best New Play nominees have come and gone from B'Way, we were so fortunate to see the powerfully funny and emotionally gripping "God of Carnage," which did win Best New Play and all four of whose actors deservedly were nominated for best acting awards. This play has the feel many times of "Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolf?" and the crazy humor and surprises of "Lieutenant of Inishmore." The actors are leaping, chasing, screaming, crying, and keeping you in stitches the entire play. This is another one that I hope ACT or Berkeley Rep will do in the next year or so.

I try to see Angela Lansbury whenever I can. She is stunningly funny in "Blithe Spirit," one of my favorite Noel Coward plays. Each of the actors in this production is again outstanding (a common theme this year, I know). The maid, as always, often steals the show. Another of our favorites, Christine Ebersole, is fantastic as the dead, returning wife -- and Little Edie from "Grey Gardens" sometimes reappears in her voice, which is fun, too. Unfortunately, this show closes in another week.

Another favorite actor of my and Ed's whom we will jump all hurdles to see is David Hyde Pierce. In "Accent on Youth," he once again did not fail to do anything but delight. This is a very well-written, funny play and kicked off our week of plays/musicals with a bang. (It too just closed its limited run.)

I can think of no other play that I enjoy reading and seeing more than "Our Town." I have seen it probably more than any other non-Shakespeare play. So, it is with both anticipated excitement as well as some skepticism that I approach each new viewing. Barrow Street's new production (now on an extended Off-Broadway run) exceeded all my and Ed's expectations. In a very intimate setting where audience sits on three sides of a small stage, where the audience can reach out and touch actors a foot in front of them, where the number of equity actors (23) is 15-20% of the people present in the arena, and where the audience is in the same dress as the actors in the fully lighted venue -- in such a setting the audience becomes literally part of "Our Town," with actors and action circling them throughout the play. David Cromer as Stage Manager is probably the best in that role that I or Ed has ever seen. Anyone in New York in the next few months should check out this Greenwich Village offering.

Two other plays we saw did not totally meet our expectations but neither did they really disappoint. "Mary Stewart" has been acclaimed by critics and by friends of ours. The two leading actresses playing Elizabeth and Mary received Best Actress nominations and are outstanding. The play, however, is like two different plays in its two acts. We, and by response our fellow play-goers, found the first act to be slow and bit laborious. Much of that act is a set of monologues as various people make the case for and against beheading Mary. At intermission, we expressed surprise, boredom, and a wondering of what all the acclaim was about. However, as soon as the curtain rises for the second act, we were on the edge of our seats for the rest of the play. The performances, the writing, and the direction at that point were gripping in every respect. If we had been late and unseated until the second act, we would have probably left saying it was one of the top three shows we saw this year.

We pick plays sometimes just to see a particular actor, even if we are skeptical about the play. So it was with "The Philanthropist," starring among others, Matthew Broderick (someone I have followed and loved his whole career). Both play and Matthew did not quite live up to our hopes. Neither was terrible by any means, and I think we are glad we went; but I could not recommend someone else go, based on our experience -- which is OK because we saw the final performance. (Our hope earlier was that Matthew's wife, Sarah Jessica Parker, would be in attendance the last performance of the run; but they just received through a surrogate mom twin girls three days prior.)

I realize that we are building a list of favorite actors whom we have now seen multiple times and whom we will make every effort to see in New York and beyond (e.g., go to LA to see if they are appearing):

Men: David Hyde Pierce, Bill Irwin, Cheyene Jackson, Nathan Lane,
Women: Audra McDonald, Patti Lupone, Angela Lansbury, Christine Ebersole, Cherry Jones
(We also have a Bay Area list that include such folks as Mark Phillips and Craig Marker, among others.)

We didn't just see shows in New York. We also ...

--> Had meals with past TravelPride cruise buds (Marty and Rich, Dan and Peter).
--> Attended the New York Pride Parade and the official, all-night party the prior evening (the "Love Ball").
--> Spent two (very) late evenings our wonderful cousins Scott, Stephano, and Idonna.
--> Went on two Big Onion Walking Tours: The History of the Financial District and The History of Harlem.
--> Spent three days with our life-long, Washington D.C. friend, Phyllis, who once again this year joined us for theater and dinners at Aureole (which we HIGHLY recommend in its brand-new, 42nd Street setting), Blue Water Grill, and Sardi's (where Phyllis is greeted as we enter by the manager and waiters much like Dolly was -- just without the singing and dancing).
--> Closed our favorite gay bars/clubs (esp. Splash and Monster) each night between 4 and 5, since we stayed on West Coast time and did not get up each morning until 11:30 or so.
--> Shopped on Loehmann's Bargain Basement and all of our favorite Chelsea stores.
--> Explored two different days large parts of Central Park.
--> Spent an evening into the wee morning at "Don't Tell Mama," a highly popular and crowded piano bar on W 46th that has a great pianist/singer each night but also invites a constant flow of entertainers up from the audience, all of whom must be unemployed but very excellent B'Way potentials.
--> Walked about 150 blocks every day.
--> Had martinis in only the way you can get them in New York.
--> Got soaked in a couple of rain storms (I forget how BIG raindrops can be back East in the summer) but also thanked our stars that we once again this year missed the hot, humid weather that everyone says New York often suffers during the summer.

So, there you have it. More than you ever wanted to know. And dare I add, "I LOVE NEW YORK!!

New York City Preview

We were able to attend some of New York City pride parade. We met friends for breakfast and then walked over to 5th Ave to watch an hour and a half before we left for a matinee show. A couple parade photos:

Eddie is writing up detailed summary of our trip that I will post soon. Until then, I will tell you that one of the biggest disappointments we had for the revival version of West Side Story. We felt it was badly cast and directed.
This video is much better version.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

link: http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1913584

Pride 2009

We are unfortunately going to miss San Francisco Pride again this year because of our trip to New York City. We are hoping we can make it to some NYC pride parties.

YouTube video called "Pride 2009". It is a celebration of GLBTQ pride and the 40th anniversary of the Stonewall Rebellion, the birth of gay pride.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEpqTIolLps

GuyDads pride news.
The blog “John and Steve are having a baby” profiles 16 gay families. We are please to be among such amazing and inspiring households.

The Lesbian and Gay Foundation in Manchester, England put together a list of 100 informative, entertaining and inspirational blogs. GuyDads made the list. Thanks!

Special thanks to POM Wonderful for the case of pomegranate juice. On the POM website the company champions the health benefits of pomegranates. I knew it was an excellent source of antioxidants. But it was news to me that the juice improved cardiovascular blood flow, prostate health and erectile function. Wow, just what a gay Jewish man needs for Pride weekend. The Jewish symbolism of pomegranates is one of righteousness and fruitfulness.

What to wear to the Opera

About once a month, someone lands on this blog by Googling “What to wear to the Opera”. I had used that phrase several years ago when I wrote about one of my first experiences of attending an opera. But my entry back then didn’t really answer the Google question. In interest of being helpful and informative, I did some research. Here are the recommendations from several prominent opera companies on what to wear to the performance:

San Francisco Opera says: “Many years ago opera was just for the elite class and royalty, and thus patrons felt it necessary to dress to the nines when attending opera. Nowadays, opera is open to everyone and there is no dress code. People come to the opera dressed in everything from jeans to evening gowns, so please feel free to attend the opera in whatever clothes you feel comfortable.” More info

New York Metropolitan Opera says: “There is no dress code at the Met. People dress more formally for Galas or openings of new productions, but this is optional. We recommend comfortable clothing appropriate for a professional setting.” More info

Washington National Opera: “recommends business attire but has no official dress code for attendance. Opening nights are traditionally more formal than other performances.” More info

Dallas Opera says: “Business attire is the norm, but anything goes, from jeans to your favorite evening gown! You’ll see more formal attire on opening night and at Saturday night performances; the mid-week performance tends to be a bit more casual. However, the rule of thumb is simple: If it makes you feel like a million bucks, wear it!” More info

This is also good advice from the Lyric Opera of Chicago: “Perfumes, hairsprays, colognes, lotions, and other scented toiletries should be avoided or used sparingly when attending the opera, as allergies are commonplace.”

The same fashion advice applies if you are also attending the Theatre, Symphony or Ballet.

The summer opera season has started up again in San Francisco. Last night we saw “Tosca”. We are also seeing “Porgy and Bess” and “La Traviata”.
Want to know what I wear to the opera? Ask my husband; he picks it out. I got tired of hearing “you are not wearing THAT, are you?”